In an effort to be a bit healthier, and decrease the amount of times I have to wake up in the middle of the night to go pee, I've been trying to drink more water during the day and very little after supper.
Yesterday, I picked up the kids from school and we went to the park to play for a bit. I only lasted for about 15 minutes before I got that feeling. You know, the feeling where you have GOT to go, there is nothing else you can think about, you can barely walk, you're back teeth are floating because you're so full of pee.
So after another five minutes of negotiation, I get all three kids and all the school bag's and lunch boxes together and we're heading towards the car. At this point, I'm seriously dying. Caitlin is walking slowly beside me and Bryanna and Devon are walking much faster along the sidewalk ahead. Actually, quite a bit ahead of us.
All of a sudden, I see Bryanna bolt off the sidewalk and start running towards our car in the parking lot. WHAT!??!! My jaw drops to the ground and a drop of pee escapes from my bladder from the shock of what I'm seeing. I've told all three kids SEVERAL TIMES NOT TO LEAVE THE SIDEWALK WITHOUT MOMMY.
Okay. So I think, I won't yell because I don't want to startle her in case a car starts to back out and she will stop behind it or have her stop and run back in my direction through the parking lot again. She will just stand beside the car and wait for me. Everything will be okay.
Have I mentioned that it's really hard to think clearly when your brain is floating in piss?
THEN, Devon jumps off the sidewalk and runs after his sister. Ahhhhrrrg. At this point I know I have to run, full bladder or not, because I see an SUV with it's white back-up lights on and my little man is heading right behind it.
NO, DEVON, STOP, STOP RIGHT NOW, DON'T MOVE. STOP. STOP RIGHT NOW. DO. NOT. MOVE. I scream as I'm running towards him in the parking lot. Thankfully, someone else walking in the parking lot who was ahead of me was able to grab him and pull him back and the SUV driver's window was down and heard a mad women screaming and stopped to turn and look.
Phew. MAJOR crisis averted, however, MINOR crisis did occur. My bladder, which has been sat on my three HEAVY babies, didn't fare so well.
And, yes, I did have a very STRONG conversation with all three kids once we were all in the car and buckled up. And once we got home. And before bedtime. And the next morning. And again as we were leaving the park today.
For the past few weeks, I've been reading my favorite blogger's website from the beginning. So far, I've worked my way from 2001 to 2005. One of my favorite things from her site was the Thinking, How to Annoy Me, How to Charm Me section. I wish she would bring them back.
The real point of my post is that while in church, I was...ehm...not necessarily paying complete attention to what was happening. I was finishing reading a post from Dooce's website. This post is completely hilarious on it's own, but when you're not supposed to make any noise -- especially laughing noises -- it is just SO MUCH funnier. Keith wanted to know why I had my head down and was making funny noises and shaking. I, being the good wife that I am, passed him my iPhone so he could read it as well.
I've learned that the only thing harder than trying not to laugh when you're not supposed to is trying not to laugh when you're not supposed to AND have your husband beside you doing the same thing.
A few people, several actually, asked me how come I stopped posting to my blog (which was quite surprising since I thought the only one reading was Keith).
I've had a lot going on lately and it's been hard to write anything that I want everyone to read. It's also been hard to write anything lately because then I would actually have to deal with feelings that I'm trying very hard to ignore. I didn't really realize how everything that has been going on in my life is affecting me until tonight when I ate 4 miami cakes, three quarters of a 10" pizza and washed it all down with a can of pepsi containing a mere 41g of sugar.
I am married to the man who used the pickup line, ‘nice bumblebee slippers’. We live in Montreal with our six-year-old daughter Bryanna, our five-year-old daughter Caitlin, and our three-year-old son Devon. Yes, I did have three kids in the span of three years and three months. Yes, I did then proceed to lose my mind. Yes, I have been searching for it in earnest ever since.